All Things CLASS

Hello all,

I am the lead teacher in a 2-year-old classroom and I have a child whose behavior we are struggling to manage. This is going to be a long post so I apologize in advance.

This particular child seems to always be seeking attention no matter positive or negative. We make sure to give her lots of praise when we see her making positive choices. We have also tried to make sure to give her some one-on-one time each day as well as ask her to do tasks to help out like throwing away trash for us. However the moment we have to end one-on-one time either to do a group task or to give another child one-on-one time, she will cry and yell in order to get more attention.

If we do not immediately go back to giving her our full attention this is where the negative behaviors begin. She will begin to take her shoes off, take toys from other children, and ignore instructions among other things. Any attempts to redirect are met with eye rolling, yelling, and sometimes hitting teachers. We have tried ignoring these negative behaviors but she will then continue to escalate them until we have to intervene. She will start to do unsafe behaviors such as standing atop furniture, hurting other children (i.e. hitting them, pushing them), or hurting herself (scratching at her face until she is bleeding).

This makes it hard to build a positive relationship with her because we are just waiting with baited breath for the next behavior, especially as this usually begins the moment she enters the school in the morning.

Any advice on this would be greatly appreciated.

------------------------------
De Anna Dukes
Chesapeake VA
------------------------------

Hi Deanna, 

I am a current candidate to the Doctor of Edu in Special Education and your post got my attention. Does she do the same at home or other environments? Consult with family. Have you done a journal and ABD- Antecedent Behavior Consequence to figure out exactly at what time the undesirable behavior happen? How about the days when there is less children in the classroom, does she cope better? Does the child have words? 

Then, I would use the Zero to Three or CDC milestones to check her cognitively, just as a guide. Does she keep eye contact and follow normal directions? It also could be that the environment (noise, light, other kids, smell, textures, etc) trigger her ability to function in a busy educational setting. The next step I would ask the director to evaluate the case and make a referral to the Infant and Toddler connection or a similar agency based on your location to evaluate the child for her on benefit. Research always says that the first 5 years of a child life are the most crucial for the child well-being.  

I think it is going to be a long road for you. The sooner the child gets help the better for her. 

tatiana

------------------------------
Tatiana Queenan
Sterling VA
------------------------------

Original Message:
Sent: 01-06-2022 18:51
From: Deanna Dukes
Subject: Handling Troubling Behaviors

Hello all,

I am the lead teacher in a 2-year-old classroom and I have a child whose behavior we are struggling to manage. This is going to be a long post so I apologize in advance.

This particular child seems to always be seeking attention no matter positive or negative. We make sure to give her lots of praise when we see her making positive choices. We have also tried to make sure to give her some one-on-one time each day as well as ask her to do tasks to help out like throwing away trash for us. However the moment we have to end one-on-one time either to do a group task or to give another child one-on-one time, she will cry and yell in order to get more attention.

If we do not immediately go back to giving her our full attention this is where the negative behaviors begin. She will begin to take her shoes off, take toys from other children, and ignore instructions among other things. Any attempts to redirect are met with eye rolling, yelling, and sometimes hitting teachers. We have tried ignoring these negative behaviors but she will then continue to escalate them until we have to intervene. She will start to do unsafe behaviors such as standing atop furniture, hurting other children (i.e. hitting them, pushing them), or hurting herself (scratching at her face until she is bleeding).

This makes it hard to build a positive relationship with her because we are just waiting with baited breath for the next behavior, especially as this usually begins the moment she enters the school in the morning.

Any advice on this would be greatly appreciated.

------------------------------
De Anna Dukes
Chesapeake VA
------------------------------

Hi Deanne , 
I was in a 2year old class room and had a child who had very similar issues. The ABC helped us recognized that the issue with our child was transition time. This child was also having these issues at home with mom and dad as well. He also had an older brother who acted out in similar fashion. Our center used a program called K I T(Kids Included Together) and it helped us out a lot . Becoming a team with the parents will help out so much. Also the administration if you have a nurse have her come in observe. Most importantly please take care of your self and your team in the class because this can be very draining on your emotional health state.

------------------------------
Nicole Londy
------------------------------

Original Message:
Sent: 01-06-2022 18:51
From: Deanna Dukes
Subject: Handling Troubling Behaviors

Hello all,

I am the lead teacher in a 2-year-old classroom and I have a child whose behavior we are struggling to manage. This is going to be a long post so I apologize in advance.

This particular child seems to always be seeking attention no matter positive or negative. We make sure to give her lots of praise when we see her making positive choices. We have also tried to make sure to give her some one-on-one time each day as well as ask her to do tasks to help out like throwing away trash for us. However the moment we have to end one-on-one time either to do a group task or to give another child one-on-one time, she will cry and yell in order to get more attention.

If we do not immediately go back to giving her our full attention this is where the negative behaviors begin. She will begin to take her shoes off, take toys from other children, and ignore instructions among other things. Any attempts to redirect are met with eye rolling, yelling, and sometimes hitting teachers. We have tried ignoring these negative behaviors but she will then continue to escalate them until we have to intervene. She will start to do unsafe behaviors such as standing atop furniture, hurting other children (i.e. hitting them, pushing them), or hurting herself (scratching at her face until she is bleeding).

This makes it hard to build a positive relationship with her because we are just waiting with baited breath for the next behavior, especially as this usually begins the moment she enters the school in the morning.

Any advice on this would be greatly appreciated.

------------------------------
De Anna Dukes
Chesapeake VA
------------------------------

hi Deanna,
This sounds like a very stressful situation for all of you.  Tatiana has given the advice I would suggest too.  In addition to her suggestions, I would also look for a physical cause.  Does this child have any illness or medical conditions, now, or in her past?    Sometimes, the first place to start is with a visit to their physician to rule out any physical causes.  Also, a child who has had a lot of health issues sometimes has a hard time with personal boundaries and attachment. 
These behaviors won't change overnight.  Remember to take breaks and take of yourself!

------------------------------
Janet Varilek
Jackson MN
------------------------------

Original Message:
Sent: 01-06-2022 18:51
From: Deanna Dukes
Subject: Handling Troubling Behaviors

Hello all,

I am the lead teacher in a 2-year-old classroom and I have a child whose behavior we are struggling to manage. This is going to be a long post so I apologize in advance.

This particular child seems to always be seeking attention no matter positive or negative. We make sure to give her lots of praise when we see her making positive choices. We have also tried to make sure to give her some one-on-one time each day as well as ask her to do tasks to help out like throwing away trash for us. However the moment we have to end one-on-one time either to do a group task or to give another child one-on-one time, she will cry and yell in order to get more attention.

If we do not immediately go back to giving her our full attention this is where the negative behaviors begin. She will begin to take her shoes off, take toys from other children, and ignore instructions among other things. Any attempts to redirect are met with eye rolling, yelling, and sometimes hitting teachers. We have tried ignoring these negative behaviors but she will then continue to escalate them until we have to intervene. She will start to do unsafe behaviors such as standing atop furniture, hurting other children (i.e. hitting them, pushing them), or hurting herself (scratching at her face until she is bleeding).

This makes it hard to build a positive relationship with her because we are just waiting with baited breath for the next behavior, especially as this usually begins the moment she enters the school in the morning.

Any advice on this would be greatly appreciated.

------------------------------
De Anna Dukes
Chesapeake VA
------------------------------

I have a similar situation and I know that it can get very challenging. I have 2 boys like that and with one of them it works when I talk to him about all the good things he can do in the classroom to help teachers and other children. He loves to be the teacher's little helper, I give him shores to do in the classroom and other responsibilities, he loves to be the helper so I make sure to remind him all the time that if he makes good choices he gets to be the helper and at the end of the day he gets a happy face on his chart, at the end of the week if he gets all happy faces he gets a price from my mystery box. with the other child he's new and and younger, He hits teachers too when he gets angry. At the moment we are working with him on recognizing his feelings and that sometimes he can be tired or hungry or sad but that doesn't mean he's angry or mad. He confuses his feelings all the time so I made a daily routine with the group during circle time and I ask individually one by one to go to the board and point to the face and show me how they're feeling today. Always remember that it takes time for them to get the idea, is not gonna happened in one day or one week, keep up the good work, I know you can do it, because you are amazing teachers =)

------------------------------
Maria Barrio
------------------------------

Original Message:
Sent: 01-06-2022 18:51
From: Deanna Dukes
Subject: Handling Troubling Behaviors

Hello all,

I am the lead teacher in a 2-year-old classroom and I have a child whose behavior we are struggling to manage. This is going to be a long post so I apologize in advance.

This particular child seems to always be seeking attention no matter positive or negative. We make sure to give her lots of praise when we see her making positive choices. We have also tried to make sure to give her some one-on-one time each day as well as ask her to do tasks to help out like throwing away trash for us. However the moment we have to end one-on-one time either to do a group task or to give another child one-on-one time, she will cry and yell in order to get more attention.

If we do not immediately go back to giving her our full attention this is where the negative behaviors begin. She will begin to take her shoes off, take toys from other children, and ignore instructions among other things. Any attempts to redirect are met with eye rolling, yelling, and sometimes hitting teachers. We have tried ignoring these negative behaviors but she will then continue to escalate them until we have to intervene. She will start to do unsafe behaviors such as standing atop furniture, hurting other children (i.e. hitting them, pushing them), or hurting herself (scratching at her face until she is bleeding).

This makes it hard to build a positive relationship with her because we are just waiting with baited breath for the next behavior, especially as this usually begins the moment she enters the school in the morning.

Any advice on this would be greatly appreciated.

------------------------------
De Anna Dukes
Chesapeake VA
------------------------------

Hi Deanna , I have encountered this behavior many times myself as an Early Head Start teacher. As suggested by many on this thread, contacting the parent first and explaining the behaviors to the child's parents is a great place to start. This will help you get an understanding if the child is displaying these behaviors at home. Talk with the parent to see if they are using any strategies to help mitigate these behaviors, and if so ,you can implement the same strategies at school. 

If this behavior is only exhibited at school then, having the child be the teachers helper , could give her a sense of ownership, while also giving her that positive attention and behaviors you are seeking. If these behaviors such as hitting teachers, standing on furniture ect persist then Speaking with a social emotional specialist could help .

Take Care!

------------------------------
Jasmine Stratton
Woodbridge VA
------------------------------

Original Message:
Sent: 01-06-2022 18:51
From: Deanna Dukes
Subject: Handling Troubling Behaviors

Hello all,

I am the lead teacher in a 2-year-old classroom and I have a child whose behavior we are struggling to manage. This is going to be a long post so I apologize in advance.

This particular child seems to always be seeking attention no matter positive or negative. We make sure to give her lots of praise when we see her making positive choices. We have also tried to make sure to give her some one-on-one time each day as well as ask her to do tasks to help out like throwing away trash for us. However the moment we have to end one-on-one time either to do a group task or to give another child one-on-one time, she will cry and yell in order to get more attention.

If we do not immediately go back to giving her our full attention this is where the negative behaviors begin. She will begin to take her shoes off, take toys from other children, and ignore instructions among other things. Any attempts to redirect are met with eye rolling, yelling, and sometimes hitting teachers. We have tried ignoring these negative behaviors but she will then continue to escalate them until we have to intervene. She will start to do unsafe behaviors such as standing atop furniture, hurting other children (i.e. hitting them, pushing them), or hurting herself (scratching at her face until she is bleeding).

This makes it hard to build a positive relationship with her because we are just waiting with baited breath for the next behavior, especially as this usually begins the moment she enters the school in the morning.

Any advice on this would be greatly appreciated.

------------------------------
De Anna Dukes
Chesapeake VA
------------------------------

All behavior is a form of communication.  We are all seeking attention in order to build relationships.

I highly recommend looking into Barb O'Neil's Transforming Challenging Behaviors trainings:

Have you read my No More Challenging Behavior Cheat Sheet? 

 

Or, maybe you have but you could use a quick refresher on some of the key strategies in the Transform Challenging Behavior method?

 

Download the Cheat Sheet (and feel free to share it with friends and colleagues). 

 

More soon and have a great week!

 

------------------------------
Susan Hinman Waldman
Practice Based Coach
Communities United Inc.
Lexington, MA
------------------------------

Original Message:
Sent: 01-06-2022 18:51
From: Deanna Dukes
Subject: Handling Troubling Behaviors

Hello all,

I am the lead teacher in a 2-year-old classroom and I have a child whose behavior we are struggling to manage. This is going to be a long post so I apologize in advance.

This particular child seems to always be seeking attention no matter positive or negative. We make sure to give her lots of praise when we see her making positive choices. We have also tried to make sure to give her some one-on-one time each day as well as ask her to do tasks to help out like throwing away trash for us. However the moment we have to end one-on-one time either to do a group task or to give another child one-on-one time, she will cry and yell in order to get more attention.

If we do not immediately go back to giving her our full attention this is where the negative behaviors begin. She will begin to take her shoes off, take toys from other children, and ignore instructions among other things. Any attempts to redirect are met with eye rolling, yelling, and sometimes hitting teachers. We have tried ignoring these negative behaviors but she will then continue to escalate them until we have to intervene. She will start to do unsafe behaviors such as standing atop furniture, hurting other children (i.e. hitting them, pushing them), or hurting herself (scratching at her face until she is bleeding).

This makes it hard to build a positive relationship with her because we are just waiting with baited breath for the next behavior, especially as this usually begins the moment she enters the school in the morning.

Any advice on this would be greatly appreciated.

------------------------------
De Anna Dukes
Chesapeake VA
------------------------------

Maybe also consider planned/active ignoring. Or transitioning her to work with another child on a project/play time.
From the beginning of the day just naming the behaviors that you like. Also consider using the cozy corner...validate her feeling and let her calm down in the cozy corner.

------------------------------
Margaret Crawford
------------------------------

Original Message:
Sent: 01-06-2022 18:51
From: Deanna Dukes
Subject: Handling Troubling Behaviors

Hello all,

I am the lead teacher in a 2-year-old classroom and I have a child whose behavior we are struggling to manage. This is going to be a long post so I apologize in advance.

This particular child seems to always be seeking attention no matter positive or negative. We make sure to give her lots of praise when we see her making positive choices. We have also tried to make sure to give her some one-on-one time each day as well as ask her to do tasks to help out like throwing away trash for us. However the moment we have to end one-on-one time either to do a group task or to give another child one-on-one time, she will cry and yell in order to get more attention.

If we do not immediately go back to giving her our full attention this is where the negative behaviors begin. She will begin to take her shoes off, take toys from other children, and ignore instructions among other things. Any attempts to redirect are met with eye rolling, yelling, and sometimes hitting teachers. We have tried ignoring these negative behaviors but she will then continue to escalate them until we have to intervene. She will start to do unsafe behaviors such as standing atop furniture, hurting other children (i.e. hitting them, pushing them), or hurting herself (scratching at her face until she is bleeding).

This makes it hard to build a positive relationship with her because we are just waiting with baited breath for the next behavior, especially as this usually begins the moment she enters the school in the morning.

Any advice on this would be greatly appreciated.

------------------------------
De Anna Dukes
Chesapeake VA
------------------------------

When I read this I thought immediately of our W****w!  That was her 100%.  In her case it was trauma related.  She had been in 5 homes before she was two.  :(  I think trauma in her background is something that should be considered.
A lot of love and helping her feel safe helped.  She was also very perceptive.  Those of us who truly loved her did much better with her than teachers who saw her as a problem.  She was at our school for 4 years and it did get much better but was never solved completely.

------------------------------
Kathy Boyd
Wee Warriors Daycare & Preschool
FL
------------------------------

Original Message:
Sent: 01-06-2022 18:51
From: Deanna Dukes
Subject: Handling Troubling Behaviors

Hello all,

I am the lead teacher in a 2-year-old classroom and I have a child whose behavior we are struggling to manage. This is going to be a long post so I apologize in advance.

This particular child seems to always be seeking attention no matter positive or negative. We make sure to give her lots of praise when we see her making positive choices. We have also tried to make sure to give her some one-on-one time each day as well as ask her to do tasks to help out like throwing away trash for us. However the moment we have to end one-on-one time either to do a group task or to give another child one-on-one time, she will cry and yell in order to get more attention.

If we do not immediately go back to giving her our full attention this is where the negative behaviors begin. She will begin to take her shoes off, take toys from other children, and ignore instructions among other things. Any attempts to redirect are met with eye rolling, yelling, and sometimes hitting teachers. We have tried ignoring these negative behaviors but she will then continue to escalate them until we have to intervene. She will start to do unsafe behaviors such as standing atop furniture, hurting other children (i.e. hitting them, pushing them), or hurting herself (scratching at her face until she is bleeding).

This makes it hard to build a positive relationship with her because we are just waiting with baited breath for the next behavior, especially as this usually begins the moment she enters the school in the morning.

Any advice on this would be greatly appreciated.

------------------------------
De Anna Dukes
Chesapeake VA
------------------------------

@Kathy Void
I completely agree!
All behavior is communication. @Deanna Dukes, you have successfully identified the "why" behind the behavior - for attention. But now its time to go a bit deeper and locate the root. Children do not have the adequate words or tools to process stress or chaos in their lives so it manifests as challenging behavior. I would discuss with her adults if there have been any major changes in her life recently.
 Try giving lots of warning when a switch is going to be made, "teacher is going to sit here with you for a minute, then I need to go check on the other children. I will be back and we will....., can you make me a ..... while you wait?"​ "Building blocks with you is so much fun. Now it is time for me to get our book for circletime, would you like to play here longer or would you like to walk with me?" 
You are doing all the right things but it does take time. No strategy works overnight. ​

------------------------------
Christina Roseli
Camarillo CA
------------------------------

Original Message:
Sent: 01-10-2022 12:26
From: Kathy Void
Subject: Handling Troubling Behaviors

When I read this I thought immediately of our W****w!  That was her 100%.  In her case it was trauma related.  She had been in 5 homes before she was two.  :(  I think trauma in her background is something that should be considered.
A lot of love and helping her feel safe helped.  She was also very perceptive.  Those of us who truly loved her did much better with her than teachers who saw her as a problem.  She was at our school for 4 years and it did get much better but was never solved completely.

------------------------------
Kathy Boyd
Wee Warriors Daycare & Preschool
FL

Original Message:
Sent: 01-06-2022 18:51
From: Deanna Dukes
Subject: Handling Troubling Behaviors

Hello all,

I am the lead teacher in a 2-year-old classroom and I have a child whose behavior we are struggling to manage. This is going to be a long post so I apologize in advance.

This particular child seems to always be seeking attention no matter positive or negative. We make sure to give her lots of praise when we see her making positive choices. We have also tried to make sure to give her some one-on-one time each day as well as ask her to do tasks to help out like throwing away trash for us. However the moment we have to end one-on-one time either to do a group task or to give another child one-on-one time, she will cry and yell in order to get more attention.

If we do not immediately go back to giving her our full attention this is where the negative behaviors begin. She will begin to take her shoes off, take toys from other children, and ignore instructions among other things. Any attempts to redirect are met with eye rolling, yelling, and sometimes hitting teachers. We have tried ignoring these negative behaviors but she will then continue to escalate them until we have to intervene. She will start to do unsafe behaviors such as standing atop furniture, hurting other children (i.e. hitting them, pushing them), or hurting herself (scratching at her face until she is bleeding).

This makes it hard to build a positive relationship with her because we are just waiting with baited breath for the next behavior, especially as this usually begins the moment she enters the school in the morning.

Any advice on this would be greatly appreciated.

------------------------------
De Anna Dukes
Chesapeake VA
------------------------------

Hi, in my class I try to help students learn phrases to express when they need help. This can be done by showing them how to do something and then saying, "Help please." Once they learn that doing and saying that they need help can solve the problem, they know to rely on these phrases before getting upset. I have also tried to make games out of activities they already enjoy doing and this seems to work.

------------------------------
Lauren Washington
------------------------------

Original Message:
Sent: 01-06-2022 18:51
From: Deanna Dukes
Subject: Handling Troubling Behaviors

Hello all,

I am the lead teacher in a 2-year-old classroom and I have a child whose behavior we are struggling to manage. This is going to be a long post so I apologize in advance.

This particular child seems to always be seeking attention no matter positive or negative. We make sure to give her lots of praise when we see her making positive choices. We have also tried to make sure to give her some one-on-one time each day as well as ask her to do tasks to help out like throwing away trash for us. However the moment we have to end one-on-one time either to do a group task or to give another child one-on-one time, she will cry and yell in order to get more attention.

If we do not immediately go back to giving her our full attention this is where the negative behaviors begin. She will begin to take her shoes off, take toys from other children, and ignore instructions among other things. Any attempts to redirect are met with eye rolling, yelling, and sometimes hitting teachers. We have tried ignoring these negative behaviors but she will then continue to escalate them until we have to intervene. She will start to do unsafe behaviors such as standing atop furniture, hurting other children (i.e. hitting them, pushing them), or hurting herself (scratching at her face until she is bleeding).

This makes it hard to build a positive relationship with her because we are just waiting with baited breath for the next behavior, especially as this usually begins the moment she enters the school in the morning.

Any advice on this would be greatly appreciated.

------------------------------
De Anna Dukes
Chesapeake VA
------------------------------

Original Message:
Sent: 1/6/2022 6:52:00 PM
From: Deanna Dukes
Subject: Handling Troubling Behaviors

Hello all,

I am the lead teacher in a 2-year-old classroom and I have a child whose behavior we are struggling to manage. This is going to be a long post so I apologize in advance.

This particular child seems to always be seeking attention no matter positive or negative. We make sure to give her lots of praise when we see her making positive choices. We have also tried to make sure to give her some one-on-one time each day as well as ask her to do tasks to help out like throwing away trash for us. However the moment we have to end one-on-one time either to do a group task or to give another child one-on-one time, she will cry and yell in order to get more attention.

If we do not immediately go back to giving her our full attention this is where the negative behaviors begin. She will begin to take her shoes off, take toys from other children, and ignore instructions among other things. Any attempts to redirect are met with eye rolling, yelling, and sometimes hitting teachers. We have tried ignoring these negative behaviors but she will then continue to escalate them until we have to intervene. She will start to do unsafe behaviors such as standing atop furniture, hurting other children (i.e. hitting them, pushing them), or hurting herself (scratching at her face until she is bleeding).

This makes it hard to build a positive relationship with her because we are just waiting with baited breath for the next behavior, especially as this usually begins the moment she enters the school in the morning.

Any advice on this would be greatly appreciated.

------------------------------
De Anna Dukes
Chesapeake VA
------------------------------

Hi Deanna,

We have a 3 years old student here who behaves the same way including
throwing chairs across the room. We took a Conscious Discipline Class
to use the tools in helping but it only works for a short time. Any
advice would be greatly appreciated.

Sincerely,
Payia Chambers
Atwater, Ca.


Original Message:
Sent: 1/6/2022 6:52:00 PM
From: Deanna Dukes
Subject: Handling Troubling Behaviors

Hello all,

I am the lead teacher in a 2-year-old classroom and I have a child whose behavior we are struggling to manage. This is going to be a long post so I apologize in advance.

This particular child seems to always be seeking attention no matter positive or negative. We make sure to give her lots of praise when we see her making positive choices. We have also tried to make sure to give her some one-on-one time each day as well as ask her to do tasks to help out like throwing away trash for us. However the moment we have to end one-on-one time either to do a group task or to give another child one-on-one time, she will cry and yell in order to get more attention.

If we do not immediately go back to giving her our full attention this is where the negative behaviors begin. She will begin to take her shoes off, take toys from other children, and ignore instructions among other things. Any attempts to redirect are met with eye rolling, yelling, and sometimes hitting teachers. We have tried ignoring these negative behaviors but she will then continue to escalate them until we have to intervene. She will start to do unsafe behaviors such as standing atop furniture, hurting other children (i.e. hitting them, pushing them), or hurting herself (scratching at her face until she is bleeding).

This makes it hard to build a positive relationship with her because we are just waiting with baited breath for the next behavior, especially as this usually begins the moment she enters the school in the morning.

Any advice on this would be greatly appreciated.

------------------------------
De Anna Dukes
Chesapeake VA
------------------------------